Every day I wake up, get
ready for school, and sit in class-
rooms at one of the most presti-
gious high schools in the country.
Every day I listen to the head-
master say something that
offends me. Every day I listen to
homophobic comments in the
hallways, and sometimes I con-
front them. Every day I think
about how I can change some-
thing. Every day I try.

I am a sophomore at St.
Johnsbury Academy, a well-
known independent school in St.
Johnsbury. I am also a queer
activist. When I came out in sev-
enth grade, I heard about gay-
straight alliances and decided
_that this was what I needed to
make it through adolescence.

Last year, when I entered the
Academy, I simultaneously want-
ed to shout on top .of a mountain
and go hide under a rock. One
day, during an active listening
demonstration for health class, I
accidentally used the correct pro-
noun while talking about my girl-
friend. The room froze; after
class,-the‘ teachers asked to speak
to me. In that brief meeting, they
asked me not to talk about those
things in class. They were wor-
ried about the response of teach-
ers, parents, and trustees. ‘

At first I was incredibly angry
with them; I had considered them
allies and they had betrayed me.
In truth, though, they were just
trying to save themselves and
theirjobs. You know that you live
in a system of fear when your
allies come to you as enemies.

That incident woke me up to

‘ the situation at my school. I start- _

ed to talk about it among friends
I knew were supportive.

In November, I attended a
meeting with Governor Dean
about gay—straight alliances. I
met about 20 other queer youths
who had started GSAs around the
state. This meeting inspired me to
talk to my health teacher about
starting one at our school. I went
to see the school psychologist,
who said she would send a memo
to the faculty asking if they
would be interested in leading
such a group.

When I went back to see her
after a few weeks, she had
received no responses. In late
November, I contacted Tori
Russell and Lore Caldwell, who
agreed to facilitate the group. In
December 1997, “Create Change
ASAP: A Gay-Straight Alliance”
started to hold meetings at
Umbrella Inc, a women’s
resource center.

We also started to clash with
the administration at school. At

Of Prnous:Prote, ad Pativit

the Academy, there is a bulletin
board that is supposed to be an
open forum for student opinion.
For the most part this is true, as
long as you do not post opinions
about abortion, contraception,
and the legalization of marijuana.
The announcements for Create
Change also disappeared within
the first day. There was a period
of time where I would just put up

  

_x

be satisfied with the steps he had
allowed me to take thus far. I was
so upset I told him that I could
not talk about the announcement
then and walked away. I went
into the bathroom, and sobbing,
swearing, and mutilating a poor
garbage can, prepared for the
classes I still had to endure that
day.

After a few weeks, Create

During an active listening
demonstration for health class,

 I accidentally used the correct

a flyer every day on my way to
class. Finally, I won the battle of
will, and a flyer stayed up for a
while.

The rest of my first year, we
were content just to exist and
consistently pull in a membership
of more than three. Personally, I
became much more open; I wore
my rainbow pin proudly and held
my girlfriend’s hand all over
town. I also attended a meeting
with the Commissioner of
Education, and discussed my
accomplishments and barriers
with my peers. ,

This fall, we tried to put an
announcement into ‘Chapel,’ the
non-denominational assembly
held ’ every morning at the
Academy. The headmaster,
Bemier Mayo, blocked it. When I
originally went in to talk to him,
he said that he had ‘wording
issues’ with the announcement.
At a second meeting, he told me
that there were parents who
would “climb the wall if they
heard about this” and he needed
to consider their rights. He said
that the term ‘straight-ally’ made
it seem like I was recruiting, and
that I couldn’tjust say “off ‘em”
to my opposition. He said that he
“did not want to endorse a heated
political debate” and that I should

pronoun while talking about my \
: girlfriend The room froze.

Change met with Keith Goslant
of Vennont Coalition for Gay and
Lesbian Rights and Sean
Donahue, who works for the
Commissioner of Education.
They outlined a list of documen-
tation that we could collect so
that they could lean on Mr. Mayo
about discrimination.

The Academy is in a unique
position as far as discrimination
is concerned because it is an
independent school. This means
that they accept both tuition stu-
dents and students whose towns
pay the tuition. Because they are
on this line between public and
private, there is controversy over
whether they are subject to the
same discrimination laws as pub-
lic high schools.

Meanwhile, the group is
preparing for an upcoming event,
and I am starting to think about
college. For me, activism and this
group are my lifeblood. I became
involved in activism because I
refused to sit mute while my
school was discriminating
against queer youth, and because
I realized that it could offer me
support and strength. This has
been one of the most amazing
and most difficult experiences of
my li_fe.V

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BURLINGTON, VT
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