/\ Until Mv Breath K) J oto ISSLIE When Chris asked if I would be interested in being a guest editor for OITM’s First Annual Poetry and Photography issue, I really had no idea what to expect. Ever an optimist, I thought it sounded like it might be great. We jotted down a brief call for submissions, wonder- ing if the deadline would bring us a mad scramble for enough poetry to fill a couple of pages. What a delightful surprise it was to get so many poems. And such wonderfulpoems too. It was truly difficult to choose which to include here. My criteria? I looked for those that would, separately and to- gether, speak to some vital part of the experience of being gay, les- bian, bisexual or transgendered, in this place and in this time. The poems here reflect a range of ages and backgrounds and stages of life; they demonstrate a mindful engagement in the dialogue of what it means to be who we are. (I include one of my own here, because Chris tells me that it's only fair to exhibit my own work to show what my I bias might be.) Please come to the August 10 reading to experience the poems live and in person. Many warm thanks to all who submitted poetry. You are all wonderful! And an equal number of thanks to all who are read- ing these poems. Enjoy. Cheryl Carmi July 1998 The staid grass stretches To the stars, wavers Like the shadow of water. The sea’s thousand probing tongues Inch up sand. A grisly coven of trees Wave their frightening arms At the moon. The land is severed Where a poem might end Had it the body of a continent. Standing along the swollen shore My ankles are consumed By, the steady throb of tides. I pull words out of my head To make room for truth. Soon, dawn will leak Out a trap door Behind those mountains And slide easily Off my skin. ’ My breath will again Become something I can believe. Because night, too, is made of blood Even the sky must die Piece by piece. Tonight, in lung-still air Behind the shadow pines A million far—away suns Burn the blackest part of the sky. — August Bleed 1 . 1» « v u 2 u -ma»: ‘l‘‘‘‘ a 1". v »-'14‘: ., ...v ...—,..-.. ,.» ...-r».. .-v. -.v a 1.: .-.~I-.~.-.~.!..~-1,1- “~\— ‘mm’ 3 '* -1‘ r‘ t Y 13‘ tv-I v3l‘i‘:.‘l! an ..;.——._...:uv--rvu c e - .x_\.\ 1,4. photo by Soot Applegate through all of this grey morning i turned over your picture from thought to rain and deeper in your wide hips and angry cigarettes carving circles in t a place i don't know and at last back again cold and empty handed —-all the ways you reach me still what lies between us is time i tasted a fresh grief of losing you on T parted dry lips — Cheryl Carmi 111.‘: '1! I. V: >6 'x‘- 9'4 I I" 'EI"£ ‘I-"fl '-Hf; .'J‘~l .I‘_!. /T Postcards Brother U I found the poetry and postcards my brother sent me, buried in a shoebox beneath the calm, yellow chill of antiquity. The skyscrapers and boardwalks he called home rise to view in my palm — torn and wrinkled panoramic sights of city streets: Castro, Christopher, Bleecker, Duval— ”Full,” he wrote, "yet so empty.” I shuffle his happiness in my hands: still—lifes of his errant ways scattered before me. I see him smile in each. He never called home. They adored him in neondrenched cities Where, I know, men dance on pillars in pink light, tight underwear, laserbeams growing into their chests and torsos. E His poetry confused me: childhood, masturbation, men together in bed. Now his life is a blur on my carpet: "Sis, you must come to New Orleans- You’d love the French Quarter!” I live an ordinary life here in Iowa and my children will grow up never knowing their lost uncle, going slowly as I scrub the drawers of my hutch; a complete resurrection and burial at once for the boy whose peregrinations became his family. The last postcard from Boston, barely legible, inscribed: ”It was the only life I had."—melodramatic, a quote from a poem. The wake is tomorrow, someplace Northeast, his remains blown A on winter snow, freezing until spring where he'll grow into daffodils and azaleas, second life, true beauty, reaching toward the sun in daylight and the moon, safe moon. — Jeff Walt (haiku) Natural Progression He said "1 love you,” and stole from me five summers. ‘ So, I found a she. — Kerry Slora ’:.|I’~1'x'u"-I rcr. '-.-:u r. i 1 M. . -. u rs 'r.'.=u—°. >2 -‘.<-.'.«-'. ~.«= an