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DYKE PSYCHE:
Lesbian Sex at Menopause

continued from page nineteen

"Since menopause my sexual desire has increased, and so

has the electric shock. Ihave never had so many orgasms in my ‘

life.”

”Changes seem to have more to do with what is going on
in relationship than menopause. Have had a recent resurgence
of sexual activity after going to a lesbian sexuality workshop.
Also doing better as a couple in our communication.”

”No change — sex is still enjoyable E I look forward to
my 60’s.”

”Sex is evener since menopause; less emotional up and
down. I experience sex more as a part of life now than as an
altered state. It's definitely different, but not better or worse.”

”All of my sexual experiences with women — even prior to
menopause have been guality - unlike the same with men, who
I must admit that in my 20's and 30's I had more
quantity...meaning, I was much more promiscuous with
men (quantity) versus the quality of sexual intimacy since
1977 exclusively with women. Since menopause, my orgasms
(whether from vibrator, self—stimulation or with a partner) have
been much more qualitative; this means that they happen more
quickly, and more multiply.

We asked women to indicate whether they felt that they
have a sex problem, and whether this is new since menopause.
The overwhelming majority of respondents (31 women, or 76%)
answered ”no” to this item. Of the 10 women who said they did
have a sex problem, comments included being dry and taking
longer time to reach orgasm. Nevertheless, many women indi-
cated even here that these were not really problems to them,
only differences since menopause.

Western culture, patriarchal culture, especially in North
America, extols and glorifies youth. It is possible that lesbian
women, who have had a great deal of practice living outside the
mainstream, are less susceptible to the pitfalls of these values.
Perhaps lesbians have an advantage when it comes’ to accepting
the changes that the years bring.

Esther Rothblum is Professor of Psychology at the University of
Vermont and Editor of the Iournal of Lesbian Studies, and can
be contacted at the Department of Psychology, John Dewey Hall,
University of Vermont, Burlington, VT 05405, email
e_rothbl@dewey.uvm.edu.. DYKE PSYCI-IE is a monthly col-
umn.

This column is based on the chapter by Ellen Cole and Esther
Rothblum that appeared in the book Lesbians at Midlife: The
Creative Transition, edited by Barbara Sang, Adrienne Smith and
Joyce Warshaw and published by Spinsters Book Co. in 1991.

M WE NEE-0 To us REAL cAReFuL.
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