Out in the Mountains

Adventures ofa Pink Triangle V V V VI

Larry Wolf

The pink triangle has become the single most widely used symbol
for gay men and lesbians to publicly identify themselves. It is a
simple graphic which can catch your eye without seeming ob-
scure like the lambda or simplistically explanatory like the double
male or double female signs. It crosses gender lines. It can be seen
on bumper stickers, buttons and earrings. Sometimes it is ac-
companied by the words “Silence = Death” and “Action = Life.”
But most often it stands by itself. ACI‘/UP and Queer Nation may
have popularized its use, but they are not its owners.

The pink triangle is worn with pride but also with fear. It has its
origins in the Nazi concentration camps where it was, like the yel-
low star was for the Jews, a sign of tenorist control. That mixture
of pride and fear is at the very heart of our lives, of anyone’s life
who puts a very personal part of themselves on public display.

I wear a pink triangle on my jacket. It is on the bumper of my car.
It is on my computer at work. To date, it has sparked interesting
conversations and, as you will see below, has led me to lend a
helping hand to strangers. Seeing it on other people’s cars adds to
my sense that we are everywhere. (I wonder why Meryl Streep
was wearing one in Postcards fiom the Edge; it’s on her denim
jacket pocket for half the movie but is never explained.)

Itisnosecrettomyfamilythatlamgay.MyloverCraigandI

 

Pearls
135 Pearl Street
Burlington, Vermont

routinely visit relatives and are treated like the couple we are. We’ve
been together for almost 12 years; I guess through persistence and
charm we have won them over. We take our gayness for granted and
expect them to respond in kind. And they do. But it’s not clear that
these supportive relatives really know anything about our lives, since
they are working so hard to make us just like they are. So I broughta
piece of history with me in the form of a pink triangle button which]
wore (tastefully added to my boutonniere) on my tuxedo at my sis
ter’s wedding. An uncle asked me to explain it. I talked about its or-
igins in the Holocaust; about the connections between the fears I ex-
perienced as aJew told to notbe too Jewish and as a gay man toldto
not be too gay. He didn’t know that gays were killed in the H01-
ocaust, though he knows of the fears of which I spoke. I expected
many more people to ask me about my button that day. Over the
years very few have. Most often, it leads to a connection with other

gays.

I was on I-89 one morning about to drive past yet another pickup
truck in the breakdown lane when I spotted the pink triangle on its
tailgate and pulled over to help. The woman seemed surprised that
anyone had stopped as I explained that I had seen her pink triangle.
She was happy to hear that I could take her to the Waterbury exit and
drop her off at work. She locked up her truck and off we went. Driv-
ing away, we introduced ourselves. It turned out that Beth is a child-
hood friend of one of my friends. Even though many non-gays as-
sume we all know each other, we had never met before. Our only
connection was the pink triangle which her mother had given her. It
made me laugh to think about how my father had tried so hard to
protect me from attacks by encouraging me to not draw attention to
my gayness, and here just the opposite was happening; a parent was
able to provide some real help by supporting her daughter’s gayness.

A few days later was Valentine’s Day. Craig had spent the evening
singing at the Pyralisk Of course I was wearing my pink triangle.l
didn’t want anyone to think that we were just friends on that day of
romance. On the way home we stopped for a late night pizza. The
woman at the counter saw the pink triangle on my jacket and asked
if I knew where she could get a bumper sticker for her car!

We would like to make this an occasional column about what had
pens when people wear a pink triangle. Write to me c/o Off M about
your experiences. And check your local book store, card shop or
wherever you see other bumper stickers for sale. If you don’t see
pink triangles, ask if they would order some. You never know who
you might meet. V

Kowalski Update

The Minnesota Supreme Court has refused to hear an appeal of
the decision granting guardianship of Sharon Kowalski to Karen
Thompson. This should bring to an end Thompson’s seven-year
battle. In a one-sentence order on February 10, the high court re-
fused to hear the appeal of Karen Tomberlin, who had originally
been appointed guardian for Kowalski by a St. Louis County
judge. “This is the final appeal possible so it’s all over,” M. Sue
Wilson, an attorney for Thompson said. “It’s absolutely wonder-
ful news that Karen and Sharon can get on with their lives with-
out any interference by anyone else.” V