Out in the Mountains

Heaven

Paul Olsen

"Heaven, a City Much Like San Francisco" so said a character
in part two of Tony Kushner's award winning play Angels in
America. Having seen the brilliant production of Perestroika
on a recent visit to New York City (that's another article) I was
excited to finally make my pilgrimage to mecca and see
"heaven" for the first time.

As a left coast neophyte, the trip was exciting from the moment
I left Burlington's International Airport. As someone who gets
motion sickness in elevators, amazingly even the flight to
California was enjoyable. Total travel time from BTV to SFO
was about seven hours which included seeing the movie
Grumpy Old Men which, much to my surprise, was not about
an evening at Pearls Bar.

Upon my arrival in San Francisco I immediately understood
Tony Kushner's comparison of the city by the bay to heaven.
During the course of my stay I continually thought that, if there
is a heaven, it must be like San Francisco. The city of San

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Francisco, and I'm sure heaven, smells like fresh flowers and is
marked by a cool ocean breeze. Surely the weather in heaven is
as beautiful as it is in San Francisco. Surely heaven is
surrounded by isolated beaches, rolling hills, and spectacular
views. Surely heaven is equipped with a gym and clientele like
that of Muscle System or the Market Street Gym. Surely the
people in heaven are as friendly as the residents of the city of
"No Left Turns" (you'll get it if you've ever driven in San
Francisco). '

Trust me when I tell you that shopping in Neiman Marcus, like
a visit to heaven, is a religious experience which may have to do
with the fact that the place actually looks like the Vatican.
Surely Calvin Klein underwear is for sale at 25% off in heaven
like it is at virtually every boutique and department store in San
Francisco. Surely heaven is littered with fabulous ethnic
restaurants like Caffe Sport, Brandy Ho's and Cafe Claude.
Surely heaven includes upscale dance clubs and cruise bars like
The Box, Spread, Detour, and Midnight Sun. And surely places
as beautiful as the Napa Valley, complete with fine wines, mud
baths, and mineral water pools, are within an hours drive of
heaven.

In the play Perestroika, the character Prior Walter, a former club
designer with AIDS, said "Oh, but the real San Francisco, on
earth, is unspeakably beautiful". To those who have suggested
that I'd never go to heaven (and there have been a few), I've been
there. In San Francisco California I visited a place that I, and
playwright Tony Kushner, think must be a lot like heaven. V

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