December 1990

Rev. Kim Harvie: Minister to the Marginalized

by Lee Russell

On October 17, the Rev. Kim
Crawford Harvie, the first open lesbian to
become Senior Minister at a Unitarian-
Universalist church, spoke at Middlebury
College. The following day she gave a
similar talk at the University of Vermont.
What follows are some of the thoughts she
shared with her audiences.

On Coming Out:

Kim has lived her whole life openly,
never hiding or apologizing for who she is,
and she projects the ease and confidence
that self-acceptance brings. She encour-
aged her audience to come out ("If every
gay, lesbian and bisexual came out tomor-
row, the world would turn upside down.")
and not to keep secrets. Secrets are destruc-
tive, Harvie said, adding, "You are only as
sick as your secrets."

Harvie encourages young people who
are questioning their sexual orientation to
take their time and not label themselves too
soon. "Coming out isn't throwing open one
closet door. It's a whole hallway full of
doors." She feels that if you can't tell
someone who you are because you're afraid
you'll lose them, "you've already lost
them." She strongly commended the work
done by Parents and Friends of Lesbians
and Gays (P-FLAG). "Not everyone at a
PFLAG meeting feels strong," Harvie ob-
served. "It's a great place for parents to go
and be miserable together."

When asked about advice she might
have for college communities, Harvie re-
sponded that she is "very strong on teaching
and encouraging leadership, which draws
people together," adding that itis extremely
important to have a few people willing to
come out for the cause.

@

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Burlington VT 05401

(802)-865-2403

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procfaim your spiritual union.
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Erica Marks, S.A.C., C.H.
Partners in Recovery and Growth

On Being a Lesbian

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 minister, "but it helps.

We who know exclusion
are in a unique position
to minister to others. We
know what it's like to
walk wounded, and the
best healing comes from
wounded healers.
Heterosexuals often
need lesbian and gay
vulnerability because it

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Harvie believes that

Rev. Giita Clark, ordained minister being a lesbian helps her
in her work because les-

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gay and’ [esgian wuprgs what it s hke to be_on_the
and‘ i_g_gue_g_ outside and 0:] the lnslfi.

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' _ our marginalized s us,

a Panmtmg wmbfiop We” and on the inside because

of the communities
we've created. Hetero-
sexuals do not have the
same experience of com-
munity that we do, and
Harvie sees part of her
pastoral work with

heterosexuals as giving them a sense of that
kind of community.

On Life At the Margins:

Harvie talked about life in the margins,
and the contributions that marginalized
people make. As in a book, she explained,
the margins give shape and a way in to the
text; they offer space where those that are
mparate can be bound together. The mar-
gins help move the text off-center; there is
a dynamic tension between the margins and
the text. "We embark on our journey as
isolated, but we arrive at the end only if we
link up with others. Work on the margins is
holy work, with its own rewards."

On AIDS:

"Having something to suffer together
helps bind people together." Harvie's work
with people with AIDS is both pastoral and
political. Her pastoral work includes work-
ing with PWA's to make sure they have
their lives in order and can deal with death.
She encourages people to do what they can
about AIDS and not try to force themselves
beyond their limits. "If all you can do in the
face of AIDS is stand there and throw
money at it, that's OK," she said.

On What She's Proudest Of:

Harvie is proud of the work she did in
Provincetown MA, where she revitalized
the Unitarian-Universalist Meeting House.
When she arrived in 1985 she went every-
where, telling everyone that the meeting
house was a place where they could come
and feel welcome. She started with a
weekly congregation of about 50 and built
it up to 400 by the time she left in 1989.

People would travel up to 2 1/2 hours

to attend services. In her congregation,
there were not just gays, lesbians and bi-
sexuals, but others on the edges of society,
including African-Americans, the dis-
abled, the lonely, recovering alcoholics
and other addicts, recovering and other-
wise.
Through her ministry, Harvie discov-
ered that almost everyone feels marginal-
ized in some way. She's proud of her will-
ingness to speak out about who she is and
what she believes in, and in so doing help
those who find themselves on the margin to
realize what a vital place it is that they
occupy in the world.

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