Recent Episode

(from previous page)
about my former lover, and tried to explain
why I’d waited so long to tell them. I asked
for reassurance that they still cared about
me, and said that I would interpret silence
as rejection.

The responses came by return mail,
and though the words were different, the
sentiments were the same. One friend said,
“I am so moved and honored by your con-
fidence. Our friendship is only strength-
ened, not by what you said, but by the fact
that you would share it with us.”

Another said, “I feel very touched that
you've finally felt safe enough with me to
explain who you are. I just wish we had
been closer and safer sooner.”

A third friend told me, “Our friendship
goes backalong way -25 yearsorso. To me
you are my friend. That hasn't changed in
25 years and I can’t see that it ever will.”

And from the fourth: “I felt sad, or
sorry, to think you might have worried that
it would affect our friendship. Along with
that feeling, I feel a deep respect for you
that you’ve worked so hard to understand
yourself and have come to respect and
honor your feelings.”

I read these letters and felt very much
loved. Though only time will frilly heal the
hurt of the break—up, these expressions of
acceptance and caring have shortened and
eased the process immeasurably.

Itisavery greatgifttobeloved for who
you are, and it is impmsible to receive this
gift when you are closeted. I'm happy to
know that some good has come from this
break-up - these friendships are stronger
and more solid now because they are now
based on openness and honesty.

One of the unexpected benefits of
coming out has been feeling confirmed in
my lesbian identity. Oh, I can still change
my mind if I want to, but as time passes, it
becomes less and less likely that I will. I
realized this summer that as a result of
coming out over the past four years, I fi-
nally feel like a real lesbian, not someone
Just going through the motions because she
couldn’t get excited about men.

_ Now that I no longer waste so much
time and energy pretending, now that I
present essentially the same self to my gay,
lesbian. and straight friends, now that my
double life has almost vanished, I find
myself free to love being a lesbian because
that's who I am.

 

 

VERMON T

+ ‘ ..<,>ur-:r:N's RU‘!
M Qicmi 6* BoRM1=;{\1)

WOMBNS MUSIC

 SERIES
HOLLY
NEAR

Sunday, November 4, - 8:00
BARRE OPERA HOUSE

Barre, VT. - $16.00 in advance

presents:

ems
WILLIAMSON

 

TRET&FllRE

Saturday, November 17, - 7:00

  

CONTOISAUDITORIUM

Burlington, VT. - $15.00 in advance

0 O 6
Sunday, November 18, — 8:00

MONTPELIER CITY HALL
Montpelier, VT. - $16.00 in advance

October 1990

Series Tickets: $45.00 To order by mail send S.A.S.E. &
check payable to Queen's Run Concerts to ORC, RD 1

Box 252, Brattleboro, VT 05301. For more information call
Box Office at 802-254-5238. Tix also available at: The
Peace & Justice Center in Burlington, VT; Buch Spieler in

Montpelier, VT; Folk in Hanover, NH; and Everyone’s Books in Brattleboro, VT.

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