Page 4, Out in the Mountains

OITM

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OOOCOOCOOOOO
Lesbian Support Group Forming

Are you a woman who previously (or
still) identifies as a lesbian and Ye‘ YOU!’
current relationship is with a man? 5'-1l3P°1't
group/network now forming. Let’s discuss
this issue that has become such a hot
topic" in the lesbian community and give
ourselves the validation and support we
need.

Call Jane at 754-8780.

Mother’s Day:

A Mother’s
Reflections ,

Since Mother’s Day falls in May, we
thought it would be appropriate to solicit a
mother's opinion on what it is like to be
the mother of a gay child. Following are
one mother's thoughts.

How to begin. I'm not sure I can
sort out my feelings sufficiently to make a
contribution to others. But for what it's
worth, I'll put down a few things

I often feel that people in general
don't think that gay people have mothers;
that somehow they came into being as they
are today in adulthood. Maybe because it's
easier to deal with a single entity than as a
member of a family. Yet a mother (and
father) is the one thing all humans have in
common since in order to exist, we have to
be born of a mother.

I am a mother. I have five children
who are all very special to me and I love
each of them for their uniqueness. They
have brought great joy into my life and
many anxieties as well, as they grew to
adulthood. As a parent I have tried to
accept each child with understanding for
what he is and I have expected in return,
the same tolerance for my foibles. I have
always felt that I had no right to expect my
children to fulfill my dreams for them or to
be disappointed when they chose their own
path in life.

Thus when my son revealed that he
was gay, I could accept it. I knew he had
not come to tell his father and I without

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much soul searching and agony. I admired
him for being willing to accept the
consequences of that revelation in order to
be true to himself. As far as I'm concerned
he is still the loving, caring and talented
person he always was and would be. I
knew I would not be able to fully
understand its meaning but I would support
him fully and endeavor to keep our
relationship as close as it had always been.
At the same time, I know his life would
have additional difficulties because of
society’s feelings about "differences" He has
always tried to live his file in an ethical way,
lived on the golden rule, which is included
in one form or another in every creed, but
which is very seldom put into practice by
most organized religions. If practiced, all
kinds of discrimination would disappear or
at least be lessened.

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My son and I have a very special,
joyful, loving relationship for which I am
grateful. I have met many of his friends in
the gay and lesbian community. I have
been impressed with their friendliness, their
caring for each otheryand their pride in
themselves. They have chosen a difficult
role to play in the community but they are
willing to advocate for their rights.

Being a mother has been an interesting
informative role for me in my journey
through this life. It is only one of the roles
but it certainly has been one of the most
difficult but most fulfilling. I also realize
that I have much more learning to do and
certainly need to think more about my role
as a mother of a gay son. I've loved being
a mother and I look forward to all the
learning yet to come.

Time to get started.