ll 5 out in the mountains I OCTOBER 2006 I MOUNTAINPRIDEMEDIAORG ESTABLISHED IN 1986 VOLUME XXI, NUMBER 9 Executive Director: Greg Weaver greg@mountainpridemedia.org Editor: Lynn McNicol - |ynn@mountainpridemedia.org Art Director: Don Eggert don@mountainpridemedia.org Inthe IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS CONTRIBUTORS THIS MONTH: Liza Cowan, Judith Ruskin, Paul Olsen, off our backs, Nikki Dalton, Augustus Nasmith, Jr., Amir Hanusic, Joe Swinyer, Leah Wittenberg, Barbara Dozetos, Gay 8: Lesbian Fund of Vermont, R.U.1.2?, Eliza Heppner, Glen Elder, Lynn Martin, E.J. Haley, Tobias Novak, Dok Wright, Renee Lang, ND; Taylor, Tammy J. Higgins, Kitty Hodgetts, Will Holden, Outright Vermont, Kate Van Wagner, Shahn D. Dickson, Sean Cooley, Lani Stack, Craig Bailey, Fran Moravcsik, Lee Lynch, Susanne Petermann, Mikhael Yowe, Stuart Granoff, Alison Bechdel, Glen Hanson, Allan Neuwirth, and Robert Kirby. COVER PHOTO: Liza Cowan. 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STATEMENT OF PURPOSE: The purpose of Out in the Mountains [OITM] is to serve as a voice for lesbians, gay men, bisexuals, transgender people, and our supporters in Vermont. We wish the newspaper to be a source of information, insight, and affirmation. We also see OITM as a vehicle for the celebration of the culture and diversity of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender communities here in Vermont and elsewhere. ' EDITORIAL POLICY: We will consider for publication any material that broadens our understanding of our lifestyles and of each other. Views and opinions appearing in the paper do not necessarily represent those of Out in the Mountains. This paper, as a non-profit organization, cannot and will not endorse any political candidates or actions of public officials on issues of importance to lesbians, gay men, bisexuals, and transgendered persons. 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Writers‘ guidelines are available on request. All materials submitted must include a name and a contact number. However, within the pages of the newspaper, articles may appear anonymously upon request, and strict confidentially will be observed. Out in the Mountains (ISSN 1081-5562) is published on the last Wednesday of each month by Mountain Pride Media, Inc. It is printed by BD Press in Fairfax, VT. OITM maintains offices at 34 Elmwood Avenue in Burlington, Vermont, USA. The bulk mail subscription rate is $29 per year within flue USA. Mountain Pride Media, Inc., DBA Out in the Mountains. Tel (802) 861 -OITM or 6486 ’ Fax (802) 860-0705. PO Box 1122, Burlington, VT 05402-1122 USA www.mountainpridemedia.org ' Our website is hosted by Vermont Design Works, 130 West Canal Street in Winooski, Vermont, USA. The site is updated with the current issue of OITM and our online archives by the 10th day of each month. OITM is available in alternative formats upon request and is printed on recycled newsprint containing 30% post-consumer and using 100% soy-based inks. @2006, Mountain Pride Media, Inc., DBA Out in the Mountains All Rights Reserved A Coming Out Story hanks to Lynn for the opportunity to write this guest editorial for Out In the Mountains. While I facilitate the R.U.l.2? Coming Out Support Group, these discussions are confi- dential. The group has heard courageous, funny, and agonizing coming out narratives. To honor group members, I would like to tell my story of fully coming out when a gay elder. I always privately ac- knowledged my sexuality, at least to myself, since I was sexually aware in my pre- teens. Life was good to’ me with two decade-long relation- ships commencing when I was 17. Following these separa- tions, 1 was partnered with the love of my life, Larry, for 27 years. Larry died in April, 2005. During all of these years, nei- ther my partners nor I consid- ‘ ered coming out. We never dis- cussed the issue. Looking back, I believe that our inaction was due to lack of visible role models, societal pressure, and unaware- ness of any reason to come out. During Larry’s final weeks, I was supported by many straight friends, including neighbors, in our very rural community. Our relationship was openly acknowledged by these wonderful men and women, many of whom have lived their entire lives in this community. So much for rural rednecks! Church friends were also supportive. Dur- ing Larry’s wake, many inquired about the ' duration of our partnership. 1 openly termed Following Larry’s death, I became involved in community groups as a volunteer. It had been 10 years since my retirement. Many asked my whereabouts since retirement, as Ihad largely remained at home to care for Larry. _ At this point, I decided to honor Larry and our very long-term partnership. It was the cor- rect thing to do. I told inquirers, “I have been caring for my partner, who died from cancer." I was, admittedly, at first unsure and con- cerned about listen- ers’ responses. Not to ‘ wony! That was June, 2005, and I continue to come out to this ' day. I have not expe- rienced one unpleas- ant incident. And, not all persons to whom I speak are of a liberal persuasion. The only dis- turbing responses have come from those who wished candor from us long ago so they might have fully shared our lives. I find these wishes very poigna.nt and moving. We do not have to come out alone. Gay friends can help, as can gay-friendly straights (and there are many of these). R.U.1.2? offers 3. Coming Out Support Group. Phone 1-802-860- 7812 (the center) or Joe (518-293-7528) for info. For those of us in the exciting state of being gay and an elder, the Gay Elders Project meets at R.U.1.2? every 4th Thursday from 5:15 to 6:30. Come out when you are ready. Support exists. V Larry as my partner during introductions with no distancing or apparent discomfort from those involved. Many of these friends, and we are Catholic, still reminisce about Larry. Joe Swinyer September 13, 2006 WITT'SEN D BY LEAH WITTENBERG t-Iv. nclfing polar ice Caps . -. the course. First I'l0rriu.no. Katrina ,nova I'm losing my conficlcnae to stay M’ Presiclenl-, ii‘ sounds like a serious caste? AL GORO phobia. . TA convcniyfi 'Tf\H'In