“The Best Restaurant in Town! ”
-John Powers,  m ‘

     
 

‘-ilulnl .r~ ,n

   

‘lint hr \x nu mt‘

wnrrnt
IIIWS EAT.

 

A~warm,
welcoming,
special place.

 

Great feasts from Thailand, Vietnam,
Burma, China, Indonesia!

Five Spice Cafe
175 Church St.
Burlington
864-4045

 

Laurie S. Rosenzweig
Attorney at Law

 

Real Estate Law, Wills,
» Family & Civil Union Issues
P.O.Box1455‘ ;<~‘ General Practice ' '
Rutland, Vermont 05701 «
Phone &; Fax: 802-786-2251

{.

Free initial consultations
3 o . 6M

Nancy Ellen Judd, MA
Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor

COUNSELING AND PSYCHOTHERAPY
I802I863.2084

2 CHURCH STREET, BURLINGTON VT 05401

TEENS | ADULTS | INDIVIDUALS | COUPLES

Fine’ Art: '%ina'ngs by Dorothy  if  '

 

Views:

The Other Side of
Marriage

banned in Canada. I refused

to watch the House of
Commons debate on the opposi-
tion party-introduced motion that
marriage be restricted to a union
of two people of the opposite
sex. The “discussion” would be
filled with earnest friends-of-
homosexuals sighing and calling
for teary tolerance and mass
hugging.

The debate would be
filled with politicians who’d
already made up their minds,
arguing for the cameras. With
nobody actually listening to each
other. For true equality, they
would blubber (because some of
their best friends have been dis-
criminated against), marriage
must include same-sex unions.

Most importantly, I
knew that what I really wanted
to hear would not surface. I
wanted to hear supporters and
allies of gay and lesbian people
talk about the importance of nur-
turing a nascent gay and lesbian
culture. I wanted to hear about
the importance of diversity and
tolerance in Canada, placed
squarely in the context of valu-
ing difference. Accepting that
forcing everyone into the same ‘
mainstream mold is not what
multiculturalism is truly about. I
wanted a gay perspective that
cheerily announced that marriage
is a hetero cultural institution —
and heteros can keep it.

I wanted politicians to
vote to keep marriage heterosex-
ual as a way of giving us the
right to be different, of celebrat-
ing who we are.

So no watching the
debate. Instead, your scribe
dragged herself out to the televi-
sion set just as the bells were
ringing on Parliament Hill, call-
ing our elected representatives to
the vote.

Yet despite my high and
mighty principles, my stomach
knotted as I waited for the results
of a nail-biter (the final vote was
134 to 137, with a straight defi-
nition of marriage being defeat-
ed). To my own surprise, I dis-
covered that a very real part of

I wanted gay marriage to be

 

me wanted that damned motion

to fail: I wanted marriage to be
opened up.

And that, of course, is
because of the reasons most of
those yucky politicians had for
voting against gay unions. They
wanted keep marriage heteroflout
of sheer hatred and bigotry.

Such is the other reason
the debate was avoided. Who
wants to sit through hours of
soul-destroying crap?

It is hard to accept a
gift, to accept an anti-gay mar-

democracy. There is a special
place in Hell for cowards.

And if you regular folk,
non-politicians, Joe Gay and
Jane Lesbian, aren’t getting
involved, that goes for double
for you. If you believe in gay
marriage, say so. If you hate the
idea — like me — say so. And say
why. So many of us mutter abou’
how stupid marriage is, but
refuse to speak out publicly.

The mainstream needs
to hear from all of us. Real
debate within our community, in
which we involve those out
there, is the only way to let them
know who and what we are.

Otherwise, we continue
to let the heteros decide for
us. V

Eleanor Brown writes about gay
and lesbian issues from her
home in Montreal, Canada. Her
work can be found at
365gay.com and
fabmagazine.com.

I wanted a gay perspective
that cheerily announced
that marriage is a hetero
cultural institution -

and heteros can keep it.

riage belief that coincides with
my own, when the reasoning
behind it is antithetical to my
very existence.

But at least the politi-
cians who showed up took a
public stance. The effort is to be
respected. Thirty-one pols didn’t
bother to make it to the vote!

Let’s say five had real
excuses ~ caught in traffic or at
the bedsides of dying relatives.
The rest deserve to be dumped in
the next election for refusing to
play their essential role in