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OITM Ad Gets Results: A Love
Story '

In January 2002 I placed an ad in the
personals column of Out in the
Mountains.

Having tried all the traditional

methods of ﬁnding a life partner I
thought I would give the personal ads a
chance. So I placed my ad, “Lesbian 47
looking for the love of her life. Are you
smart? Are you funny? Are you kind?
Can you stand in your life and still share

I mine?” and then I waited.

I got a few responses to the
ad, and among them was an email from a
woman (Mitch) in Londonderry, VT say-
ing yes she is smart, funny and kind, and
she may well be the love of my life but
she was really looking for a good friend.
I got no response to my email reply and
had almost written her off as a ﬂake
when I discovered that something was
up with my system that day, "and all the
e-mails, I sent ended up in cyber limbo!
So I took achance and re-emailed Mitch.

Meanwhile Mitch had decided
that I was not interested in being friends,
and she had written me off as a ﬂake.
But when she got my second email, she
called me. We had a long chat and met
for dinner the following Monday,
February 4th 2002. We met at the restau-

. rant at 6i00 —‘ at 9:00 the staff was vacu-

uming around us and giving us looks
that meant it was time for them to close.
Anyway it didn’t take us long to become
much more than “Just Friends”!

Four months later I asked
Mitch to marry me (another long story
for another time), and on February 13th
of this year we were joined together in a
civil union ceremony on the shores of
Silver Lake in Barnard, VT. It was a
beautiﬁil private ceremony outside under
the stars with a full moon, bon ﬁre, and
candles to light upkthe night. Oh, did I
mention that it was 30 below zero that
night??

Also during the year ﬁom

' when I met Mitch to when we were Civil

Unioned we bought a house in Royalton,
VT and became Grandmothers to a beau-
tiful girl —- the only bad thing about that
is that the Grandgirl and her parents
(Mitch’s daughter and son-in-law) live
too far away in Portland, Oregon (like
they never heard of Portland Maine??).
Fortunately Mitch’s son lives near by in
Vermont so we do get to spend time with
him. .

So for the price of a free ad I
got the most wonderﬁil woman in the
world, a great house that with Mitch’s
touch has become a warm and inviting
home. and a great family that although
geographically scattered is close at heart.

I ask you how lucky can one
woman get???'? -

Anne Beck
Royalton

Reveling in History
Earlier this month, I spent over an hour

going through issue after issue in the
online Archive of OITM issues on the
Mountain Pride Media website. What a V
treat! What a walk down memory lane!
Does anyone remember Howdy Russell
as he bravely held a Statehouse press
conference in!March, I987 announcing
the introduction of our community's first
Lesbian/Gay Anti-discrimination legisla-
tion? Check out the picture. Hard to -
believe that in 1987, O1TMwas only in
its second year of publication!

Thank‘ you to all of the volun-
teers who have worked to make so much
of our recent Vermont LGBT community
history so easily accessible through these
archived 0ITMs. What fun, what memo-
ries, if you lived it, like I did! I bet it
would be a lot of ﬁin too to be reading it
all for -the ﬁrst time!

OIT M has played a central
part in building and preserving the
Vermont LGBT communities we all
enjoy today. Seventeen years of publish-
ing OITM! Go to the MPM/OITM
Archives and appreciate our past. But
let's also work together today to insure a
vibrant next seventeen years for OITM!

Thank you to MPM/OITM
staff, board and volunteers for a fabulous
newspaper and website,

,BiIl Lippert

(wearing no particular hat today)
Hinesburg

Voter Advice

I just want to wish Govemor Howard
Dean the best as he launches his cam-
paign for President of the United States.
However there was one sign at the rally
that I want the people to completely
ignore: “VOTE GREEN NOT DEAN.”

Please do not waste your vote

by voting .Green. Not only [does] their
leader, Ralph Nader,-_[have] a few loose _
screws, Nader divides the Democrats’
vote and allows the far right to win.
There is nothing “green” about that
party. They allowed George Bush to win
in 2000 and now he has declared'war on
the environment. Thanks alot Ralphie!
Remember people — Vote Dean NOT
Nutty Green!

Michael S. Luna
Fletcher

Maybe We Deserve It
My first introduction to gay nightlife
was so depressing it almost pushed me
back in the closet. The establishment,
once a renowned and popular club, was
literally falling down around you. During
a rainstorm, you were well advised to
use an umbrella - inside. The gay com-
munity supported this business for many
years just because it was the only show
in town. The “Yacht Club” ended up like
the “Titanic” — sinking out of business.
But as l’ve come to learn, some things
never change.

Being in the civil union state,
my partner and I naturally assumed there

would be clubs and perhaps a restaurant

or two, which catered to the gay commu-
nity. Of course, we were disappointed to
discover that only one gay bar existed in
the whole state._ ‘

We knew we weren’t going to
a classy establishment, nonetheless, we
wanted to be around other gays and les-
bians to celebrate our “Pride.”
Unfortunately we didn’t witness much to
feel proud about. ‘

First, the cover charge: I
shouldn’t have been surprised about the
$10 cover charge — aﬁer all, on an
evening with no entertainment or theme,
there’s an unreasonable $5 cover for the
privilege of sitting in a ‘dank, depressing
hole in the wall,’ as others in our com-
munity have described it to me.

Secondly: The behavior on
the dance ﬂoor was downright
deplorable. I’ve seen Gay Pride Parades
in NYC and am no prude. But what we
witnessed was exactly what the straight
community sees us as — a bunch of over-
sexed, out-of-control perverts without an
ounce of self-respect.

Thirdly: The music was
awful. The entire room was ﬁlled, but
only two couples were actually on the
dance ﬂoor — not dancing, maybe saving
money on the hourly rental of a hotel
room. We requested dance music that we
know others would have enjoyed, yet we
were ﬂatly and rudely refused. Isn’t it a
DJ ’s job to make sure the majority of the
people are out on the dance ﬂoor having
a good time? p

What will it take for the gay
community to stand up and say, “We
deserve better”? We deserve a place that
is cheerful, classy, bright, and welcom-
ing. We deserve a place where people
can’ have ﬁin, but are also expected to
behave within reasonable limits. We
deserve not to get ripped off by being
forced to pay a cover charge just to walk
in the door. We deserve the same as
straight customers demand and receive
in their clubs.

Or do we?

As long as we continue to
support places like this, they will exist
.2. and thrive. When we demand so little,
that is exactly what we get in return. It is
a shame that those who own such busi-
nesses take advantage of our lack of self-
esteem and agree with us that we don’t
deserve better. We oﬂfer them no incen-
tive to provide it.

As for my partner and I, we’ll
take a trip into Montreal from now on
whenever we feel the urge to dance.

Jill Van Tuyl
So. Burlington

Queerness on the Air

Have you heard the Samara Foundation
sponsorship spots on Vermont Public
Radio during June and July? ”This pro-
gram is sponsored by the Vermont
Community Foundation — celebrating
Samara Foundation’s support of lesbian,

gay, bisexual and transgendered
Vermonters through grantmaking and
endowment building.”

An anonymous donor to the
Vermont Community Foundation sup-
ported VPR — and our LGBT community
—— by buying a year ‘s worth of sponsor-
ship spots, six times per week, and gen-
erously donated two months — June and
July — to Samara Foundation.

As one listener put it, “It has
been a thrill to hear those Samara spon-
sorship spots on Vennont Public Radio.
Just to hear them say ‘gay and lesbian’-
out loud on the air at long last makes my
heart go pitter pat.”

Another supporter called from
her car phone, “I never use my cell
phone in the car,,but I just HAD to call I
was so excited!” Stopping me on Church
Street, one person commented, “I lis-
tened closely to see if ALL of the LGBT
words were used! I was glad to hear all
of them!” One of our board members
noted, “The announcer seemed a little
awkward at first — saying the LGBT
words — but got more and more comfort-
able as the weeks went by and by! The
words began to just roll off of his
tongue.”

A veteran member of our
Vermont LGBT community shared a
story, “I’ve been around long enough to
remember when a group of gay guys got
together during a VPR ﬁmdraiser and
made the winning bid on a lunch date
with whoever the governor was then.

I They wanted to have the credit line for

the purchase read something like, ‘con-
gratulating VPR and all its gay ﬁ'iends,’
and VPR refused to read the line and
might even have reﬁinded the money.
They said it was ‘too controversial.”

This long-time community
member continued, “I think that the air-
ing ofthe Samara spot is one of the ben-
eﬁts of the trauma we went through with
civil unions — there was a nondiscrimina-
tion law before that, but no one forced
VPR to comply. But with the exposure
of the kind of naked bigotry we faced,
more and more people are getting it that
their silence, their erasure and exclusion
of us as a constituency, contributed to an
atmosphere of hate. They are changing
(with signiﬁcant help from us) because
they don’t want to see themselves as
aligned with the bigoted and hateful.

“It’s terriﬁc, Bill. Bravo!”

Hearing our “Lesbian, Gay,
Bisexual, and Transgendered” communi-
ties narned so completely respectfully on
VPR, with a tone of appreciation and as
a part of Vermont’s full community has
been fabulous. And, for Samara '
Foundation to receive such broad,
statewide exposure for our work, pro-
vides new opportunities to broaden our
reach to new supporters.

If you heard the
Sarnara/LGBT spots on VPR and have a
reaction or story to share, please email
me at bill@sarnarafoundation.org.

Wouldn’t you like to keep

letters

hearing LGBT-positive Samara spots on
VPR or Vennont Public Television?
Want to help? Give me a call at 860-

-6236! I look forward to hearing form

you.

Bill Lippert
Executive Director
Samara Foundation of Vennont

Thanks from the South

The AIDS Project of Southern Vennont
would like to thank the following for
their support in our efforts to raise
awareness of HIV/AIDS in Bennington
through Mayfest and our 6th Annual
AIDS Walk. Thank you to the following
local businesses who gave openheartedly
a donation of a rafﬂe item for our rafﬂe:
Evan’s News, Panache, Flower Works,
Ann Marie's Pizza, Knapp’s Pet Shop,
Armstrong Jewelers, Willy’s Variety, VT
Video Stop, Benn. Bagel Shop, Benn.
Bookshop, Black Swann, Alldays &
Onions, Oldcastle Theater, and
Rattlesnake Cafe’.

Thank you to Sunshine Wohl
from the Chrysalis Community for her
opening statement at our AIDS Walk,
which was beautiful. Thank you to
Merriam Graves for the helium and to
Dan Lucey and students from S. A.D.D.
(Students Against Destructive
Decisions).

A special thanks to the fol-
lowing volunteers who helped make
these events happen: Burt Lucier, Dan
Tifﬂ, Hilda Outwater, Ashley Washbum,
Anna Krawczyk, Maureen Gassaway,
Alice Mazur, Merybeth Merriam, and
Gina Mentiply. Thanks for the wonderful
entertainment that was provided by the
band known as “Remember Sammy
Jenkins”: guitarist Rich Ellis, bass Ryan
Presault, and on the drums David Kane.

Thanks everyone and it is
great knowing that there are awesome
people like yourselves who feel that our
work with the HIV/AIDS population is
as important to you as it is to us.

I would like to take this time
to congratulate Ashley Washbum, Hilda
Outwater, and Dani Tifﬁ for graduating
ﬁ'om Mount Anthony Senior High
School this June, and we wish them the
best ofluck in their new lives. You will
be sadly missed but never forgotten here
at the AIDS Project of Southern Vennont.

Rose Rahilly
Program Associate, Bennington
AIDS Project of Southern Vennont