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Feast your eyes: there’s sushi, egg rolls,
salads, burritos, desserts, cold drinks,
and dozens of other Ways to indulge
your appetite. And they travel!—

 Onion River Co-op
meat produce delicatessen

and seafood

fresh dairy

82 S. Winooski Avenue, Burlington Between Pearl and College 802-863-3659 open every day 7am—1lpm

Sarah Harrington, a Realtor

dedicated to our community!

- Mountain Pride Media — Board Member ’99, ’00
- Pride Committee — Silent Auction ’98, ’99, ’00

I - Rainbow Business Association - President ’98

I Call Sarah if you're buying or selling your home.
North Professionals

WM batonimu lntlqnxlutly I)-nsl uu.l0pa-uni

'~ 463 Mountain View Dr, Ste. 200, Colchester VT 05446

(802)655-9100 X3

 
 
 

 

A New Choice in Women's Health Care

Complete Nurse-Midwifery Service Provided by
I Lisa Hotte Kelley, CNM

Offering:
V Personalized prenatal care 9/ Women's GYN care
0/ Delivery at FAHC by midwife with physician collaboration and consulation available

Chamgi |ainOBGYN

55 Main Street 0 Essex Junction, VT 05452
802-879-1802

tip top CAFE

FIRE SEASGNAL F088 lit} A CASUAL ATMOSPHERE

SERVING LUNCH 11:30 - 3:30 MON.-“SAT.
SERWNG DINNER 5:30 - 9:00 THUR$., FRI. AND SAT.

JAZZ FRll)AY NIGHTS 8:30 - 11:30
am. came AND FR¥El\lt}S

85 Noam Mata: SIREET, Wt-li?E RIVER }Ut\tCTtGz~.t, tn“.

{802} 295-44 1 1

E-Matt: MlDBRt30K@SOVER.NEI {T0 RECEWE NEWS OF SPECIAL EVENTS* *)

* *(GL'E.fi:Rts reading Stméay June 1st, 3-5 PM “Stonewall: recottections/ regiercussioasfi

hat is it with dykes
and home improve-
ment? Can science

explain why lesbians love to
peruse aisles of ventilation fans
and vinyl flooring? Do we have a
uniquely Sapphic hypothalamus
that predisposes us to a fascina-
tion with switchplates‘ and spack-
le, an instinctual drive to wander
among sink faucets and screen
doors? Is it inborn, or do we
choose this lifestyle? Perhaps, in
lieu of full access to legally rec-
ognized marriage, we are trying
to confirm our commitments with
tub caulk.

Unfulfilled by lesser
projects, we eventually graduate
to the harder stuff, such as major
appliances. The high can be
instant and long-lasting. Last
weekend my domestic partner
and I partnered up for a seriously
domestic activity — we went
shopping for a new refrigerator.
Out of the closet and into, the
showroom!

Up and down the rows
we strolled. We inspected veg-
etable crispers and peered into
freezer compartments. We
checked energy ratings and war-
ranties, all the while utterly
oblivious to such niggling con-
cerns as rising gasoline prices
and World War III.

All afternoon we ogled
the floor models and compared
features. We immersed ourselves
in the domain of ice-makers and
humidity controls, slide-out
shelves and butter bins. We suc-
cumbed to theseduction of
refrigerator design vocabulary,
which is clearly intended to lull
lesbian shoppers into an altered
state. Side by side, bottom mount
and top mount — who would have
guessed these terms flourish
beyond the boudoir!

In a euphoria brought on
by so many possibilities, we
wandered from model to model,
opened each door and stood there
discussing our options. Naturally,
we had to deliberate over every
feature. The wine rack is stan-
dard on some models, but we
don’t drink, unless you count
Passover’s four glasses of
Manischewitz, which comes in a
square bottle anyway.
Considering that we already own
a ten-dollar Brita, we don’t really
need the built-in water filter.
which costs as much as a small
nuclear power plant and is just as
dubious. We agreed we could
continue filling our own freezer
trays and avoid having to live
with the insufferable contradic-
tion of calling those frozen half
rounds from the automatic ice-
makers “ice cubes.”

As much as Sweetie and
I like to think we’re beyond
appearances, we had to at least
consider the issue of looks. The
almond one with the contour

 
  

 

 

door is glamorous but also the
most expensive. The boxy white
one is stodgy but energy—efficient
and has a light in the freezer. The
' stainless one reminds me too
much of the morgue in Crossing
Jordan.

We fantasized bringing
the different styles home for a
trial run until we were sure we
had a match. I wanted to com-

We checked
energy ratings
and warranties,
all the while
utterly oblivious
to such niggling
concerns as
rising gasoline
prices and
World War III.

pare each one’s effects on the
illuminated profile of my naked
girlfriend during a midnight
snack attack.

But those were unrealis-
tic thoughts and sooner or later
we were going to have to get our
heads out of the refrigerant and
make a decision. Sales people
approached to give us details
about various specials, rebates
and home delivery offers. But
they politely backed off when
they realized they couldn’t help
with our interpersonal delibera-
tions.

We debated for hours,
exercising our best communica-
tions skills and being conscien-
tious about using ‘‘I‘‘ statements.
“I feel that a chilled meat drawer
is an unnecessary luxury for
tofu.” “I hear you saying the
spill—catcher shelves will prevent

V leaky take—out containers from

dribbling garlic cggplant ontothe
sponge cake.” We went to such
lengths to make our final choice
that if any TV producers hap-
pened to overheat us tliey would
have come up with on cdgc—of-
your-seat sequel to Jut-
/l/Ii/lionuirv called ./u Fr/,tgizluii'c.

I can just imagine the
sales staffcomplaining about us
in their breal< mom.

“Another couple: of > >